Proposed Merger

kissimmee

Donald Trump floats foreign policy proposal

August 12, 2016

KISSIMMEE, FL (API) — Following yesterday's rally in Kissimmee, Florida, Donald Trump’s campaign issued a press release that outlined a bold, new foreign policy proposal.

“To demonstrate that my campaign is truly inclusive and to simultaneously resolve some pressing issues, I am suggesting a strategic merger of two great nations: the United States and Mexico,” said Mr. Trump. “In business, it’s not unusual for a large corporation to merge with a lesser one. So why not apply this same principal to nations? Given Mexico’s depressed economy and their huge outstanding debt to the United States, we should be able to complete the purchase for between 10-20 cents on the dollar. In fact, there’s a good chance that they’ll simply give us their country if we agree to forgive the debt.

“The merger will quickly alleviate many of the pressing problems that the two nations face. First, it will solve the Mexican immigration issue. Following the merger, all Mexican nationals—whether they are living illegally in the United States or still residing in Mexico—will automatically become legitimate citizens of the new combined country. No more will they have to brave a dangerous trek to the U.S. or deal with merciless coyotes. They’ll already be in the country and will be free to move anywhere within it that they choose.

"Second, there’s the issue of the border wall. Currently, Mexico doesn’t want to build or pay for it and, frankly, neither do we. A 750-mile wall would be prohibitively expensive to build and guard. Instead, we can erect a much smaller wall (no more than 125 miles wide), spanning the narrowest part of Mexico between Veracruz and Oaxaca.”

Mr. Trump went on to say that the combined country would be called the United States of the Americas or Americo, for short. When used as an adjective, Americon would replace American, such as “Many foreigners want to move here for the Americon jobs.”

Although such a proposal would normally require the approval of Congress, Mr. Trump is hopeful that it can be completed via Executive Order. Trump stated: “When I become President, I’ll be in charge and what I say will be the law of the land. The American people admire me because of my business acumen. They shouldn’t be surprised if I want to immediately put it to use."

—Steve (DummyDonald.com), August 12, 2016

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